Tuesday, September 27, 2016

8 Weeks

The pregnancy apps on my phone tell me that the embryo is the size of a kidney bean or a "big juicy raspberry". These two items seem quite disparate in terms of size and shape, don't they? I feel like all the pregnancy website/app companies should come together and agree on the fruits/vegetables that will be used to show human baby size progression. And why does it have to be food?! The last thing I want to do when visualizing the baby is to associate it with a food that I perhaps want to eat!

Not much to report this week. To be honest, it feels like time is creeping by. I still have a lot of anxiety about everything. I felt reassured last week after the ultrasound, but every day since, I wonder "what if something has happened in the x days since then?" Mike tells me that worrying so much won't help since it's out of my control, but it's hard to let go. I wonder if the anxiety will ever go away. I mean, even once the kid is out I'm sure I'll still be worrying about one thing or another!

I also have my first (hopefully last, too!) pregnancy cold. It sucks. Normally I would be in a NyQuil induced stupor each night, but instead I'm forced to suffer. I'm a super big fan of taking medicine in lieu of suffering, so this is really hard. I read somewhere that certain decongestants might be ok. If I'm not feeling better soon, I may call the doctor and check. At least I don't have a fever which could be bad for the embryo (silver lining?).

Monday, September 19, 2016

7 Weeks and a Heartbeat

I will be 7 weeks tomorrow. I'm physically feeling pretty good. My fatigue has increased and I find that I get dizzy when I stand up too quickly, but thankfully, nausea has been at a minimum so far. We had our second (more on that in a minute) ultrasound today and got to see the little flicker that is the embryo's heartbeat! It was strong at 146 bpm. I was amazed that we were actually able to HEAR the heartbeat too. It was so surreal. They said that everything is measuring well ... s/he is measuring a couple days ahead at 7w1d. I'm hoping this is not an indication of a large baby to come!

I did not post last week because we had a bit of a scare and I could not bring myself to write about it until I had additional reassurance from this week's ultrasound. On Tuesday, I woke up to red bleeding. Looking back, I don't know if I would call it "heavy", but it certainly was not just spotting. I called the doctor's office as soon as they opened and they were able to get me in for an ultrasound that morning. We were so scared. I was preparing for the worst while holding on to hope. I researched online all morning and it seemed like bleeding is more common in early pregnancy than I thought. I was not cramping at all and from what I read, this was a good sign. The ultrasound showed a gestational sac, yolk sac, and the embryo, but they couldn't see a heartbeat because it was a little early at only 6 weeks. They also saw the area of bleeding. I asked what was causing it and the nurse guessed that it was potentially some tissue breaking off from implantation. So we left reassured that our embryo was hanging on, but I was a nervous wreck all this week. The bleeding went from red to pink to brown and became much more like spotting over the course of a few days. Still, I panicked every time I had to go to the bathroom. What if it came back? Today, they were able to see the bleed again and they said it was much smaller and looked to be resolving itself. Thank God! 

I'm still nervous, but feeling more hopeful after today. I read that the risk of miscarriage is much lower once a heartbeat is detected. The next milestone will be the end of the first trimester which won't be until early November. I'm sure it will be here before I know it even though it sounds so far away now. Luckily, we don't have to wait that long before our next ultrasound: we go back in two weeks. I'm all for seeing the embryo as much as they will let me!

To end on a good note, here are some pictures from our ultrasounds. 
6 Weeks: The little bright line at the bottom of the yolk sac is the embryo
7 Weeks: The ring is the yolk sac and embryo is the little glow worm looking thing to the left :)

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

5 Weeks

Last night, I told Mike that I would be five weeks pregnant today and he said, "What?! How did that happen? How is that even possible?" I will admit to being similarly in denial although for a different reason: he was confused about what constitutes "day one" of pregnancy, while I am in shock that this is even real in the first place! I feel pretty normal ... maybe if you pressed me, I'd say that I'm a little more tired, have some occasional cramps, and don't have a huge appetite, but that's really it (knock on wood!). I wonder when it will start to feel real? Maybe after our first ultrasound? Once we start having to look at daycares? When my clothes don't fit anymore? Who knows the moment, but I'm sure reality will hit hard when it finally arrives. I already get anxious thinking about the whole process and all there is to be done, so for now, I will take it one day at a time.

Another milestone that I will thoroughly enjoy this week will be my freedom from the devil known as Endometrin. This is your warning to stop reading if you don't want to hear about things like suppositories and discharge! I'm about to go all TMI on you. Here we go ...

So I guess it's pretty typical after IVF to be put on some sort of progesterone supplement. From my reading, it sounds like there are three main types: oral, vaginal suppositories, and shots. Oral is the least effective and so is not used much. I've read that the shots are super painful because they are intramuscular and many women end up with soreness, bruising, and difficultly sitting. My doctor uses the suppositories (my brand is Endometrin). I am on three per day and if I only had to put up with the constant leaking throughout the day (which is pretty gross), I would a-ok. I mean, what's a little discharge after stomach shots and egg retrievals and whatnot? Unfortunately, Endometrin also causes spotting. Can I tell you how scary it was to wake up to spotting Friday morning before I got my results?! I was sure at that point that I wasn't pregnant. When the nurse called in the afternoon and gave me the news, I told her about the spotting (it had been light brownish) and she reassured me that it didn't sound concerning and that it was probably the Endometrin which can irritate your cervix. Whew! Then this weekend ... more spotting ... and this time it was PINK. Since the doctor was closed, I spent the weekend googling various combinations of "Endometrin", "spotting", "discharge", and "pink". I was mostly sure that it was the same issue as before, but the pink really threw me off. Today I called the nurse for further reassurance, and yes, apparently Endomerin can cause a whole rainbow of discharge colors. Ugh. Anyway, Thursday is my last day on those and if I could celebrate with champagne, I would. But I can't, so maybe I'll splurge and have a Fresca instead to commemorate the moment!

Saturday, September 3, 2016

BFP

BIG FAT POSITIVE!
Positive results were via a blood test, but I POAS just for fun :)
We got the results yesterday and I'm still in shock. I was so sure they were going to be negative. What a crazy, happy surprise!