I had a doctor appointment today for my glucose test, Tdap vaccine, and just regular prenatal checkup. It was nice to talk to the doctor since I hadn't seen her since they transferred me to the second hospital (she doesn't practice there). I told her how anxious I have been and she understood exactly saying that I probably have PTSD about it. It's so true! Every night I worry I will wake up to blood and every bathroom visit I worry it will be there. The fear seems to get better every day, but it is still very much there for now. The hardest thing for me is the total lack of control I have in all this. It's out of my hands. She did say that 28 weeks is a big milestone and 32 weeks is even better. I asked about such young babies having lasting disabilities and while there is a higher risk, she said that medical science is amazing these days and she worries more about people who deliver at 24, 25, 26 weeks. This made me feel better although I still want baby to stay in there ... partially because I feel like we aren't ready yet! The house isn't ready, we haven't taken the birth classes, I don't have my maternity leave paperwork filled out yet ... AHHH! But again, it's out of my hands, and I can only pray for the best.
I also have a growth ultrasound scheduled for Friday and the doctor said that I will have a growth ultrasound every three weeks after that along with a BPP assessment every week. She felt bad about all the appointments, but I think for me it will be reassuring, so I'm not worried about it.
One thing I didn't mention last post was that on Wednesday when this all happened, I was actually supposed to be flying home to Louisville for my baby shower. Such a bummer that I had to miss it, but I was able to FaceTime through my mom's iPad, so it sort of felt like I was there! My aunt and cousin planned lots of yummy foods and fun games and I hope people had a good time (can you tell I feel guilty for not being there even though I know it wasn't my fault?). I daily feel humbled by how blessed we are with such wonderful family and friends!
So now it's onward and upward into the 28th week ... one day at a time.